Be Who You Needed When You Were Younger...

Life is funny.

For a while now...months and months...I have felt an inner urge to write my first blog.

"Where do I begin? What do I even have to say?"...were questions that would often halt any creative and authentic musings to come forward.

Having an infinite amount of stubborn patience - I am a Taurus, after all - and believing that my first blog would be (mostly) effortless, I've forced no premature words, and instead tried to keep up with the jumbled words and ideas fighting for me to unscramble them and get them down on paper.

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​Last week, another surge of blog ideas found their way to me. "YES," I felt, "my first blog is near." It also became clear on which writing would take center stage and emerge first. Still, the timing wasn't right to write.

This morning while enjoying my fatty coffee and good book ritual, reading Elizabeth Gilbert's words "done is better than good" was just the motivation and nudge I needed to write.

​               Done is better than good.
​                                   Done is better than good.

Letting go of any expectations for this first blog, I will simply start AND finish.
​Done is better than good.

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So, here we are...

The "letter to my infant" shared​ below came to me on a flight home after experiencing a weekend conference in Florida learning how to facilitate Guided Breathwork. In any great training, the best way to learn the skills of facilitation is to first experience receiving the skill as a willing participant. 

Whoa! As a participant, my entire Being was cracked wide open...

• I connected with my deepest of deep-seated soul wisdom;
• I experienced spiritual and energetic understandings of certain patterning and blockages I carried;
• I received necessary guidance from loved ones who had previously passed, informing me on how to shift these patterns and blockages;
• I was flooded with absolute appreciation and gratitude for my parents - who they are/were as individuals, as a couple, as parents - for all their shortcomings, as well as their gifts and blessings...and a softening of forgiveness was felt throughout my entire Being.

​And the big one...

• I became overwhelmed and was in awe when the over three decades of unattended birth trauma came whooshing to the surface of my awareness as if the only way for it to get my attention was to create a tidal wave of energy to come crashing into my experience. Well, I noticed. It captured my attention.

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The beautiful, loving soul of my peer holding space for me as the guided breathwork practitioner was just what I needed. Her incredibly present and gentle way of being allowed the traumatized infant within me to express itself through the quiet release of tears and a trembling body that was out of my control.

​I knew not to judge my experience, and instead stay with it in presence, curiosity, and breath. I knew the trembling was simply held fear and trauma being released...finally. Finally!

​While there wasn't enough time to continue working with my little infant during the training weekend, enough care and attention was given to her and handed off to me to continue the process of working with her more on my own.

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It was on the plane ride home, that the "letter to my infant" was birthed.

After crafting and reading this letter, I realized it was not only a letter to my infant, but to the infant that resides within each of us...

• to the infant that came into this world in a less than ideal (but often necessary) way;
• to the infant whose bond was not able to be immediately formed with its mother;
• to the infant who needed more conscious presence, attention, and attunement from its parents and caregivers; and,
• to the infant that has simply been waiting years to receive the message below...

          ...This is for you.

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Be Who You Needed When You Were Younger ~
​a message to the sweet infant that resides within each of us

​​"​I openly and lovingly welcome you to this place, sweet Soul, and feel so blessed that we’ve arrived here…together. You are so loved already and are such a gift to this World.
 
You may not realize it yet, but you have a very important role to play on this planet, and I will do everything in my power to help you uncover and deepen your relationship with whatever that is.
 
I am honored that our paths have crossed. The world is a better place with you here. You are a miracle and a vital piece to our Collective Global Tapestry. Mama Earth needs you to be You! Let’s savor in that and really explore how you truly wish to show up and serve!
 
I deeply know there is a magnificence inside of you that will raise global consciousness, unity, and love. It’s okay that you may not know how to connect with this truth yet.
 
Let your light shine, little love angel.
In times of inevitable darkness, however, and in those times that you need to rest…rest.
 
Allow yourself to rest…without judgment.
Allow yourself to recharge…with patience.
Allow yourself to re-set, re-member, re-center, and re-enter.
 
And please don’t forget that the simmering light that lives within you is also the Light that will guide you back home to yourself. Always…in all-ways.
 
You are a teacher of grace, humility, purity, and unconditional love – and are an assistor of global peace and harmony.
 
You have an infinitely kind, gentle, inquisitive, and loving Spirit that calms and warms everyone you are near, even if you don’t realize it yet.
 
People are drawn to the security of your loving, open-hearted energy – as if a magnet is leading them toward you. Did you know that?
 
You are a beautiful angel baby that inspires people to embrace the notion that anything is possible. Your determined cries expressing your needs and desires, helps bring clarity to people about their very own needs and desires...as if lifting a veil allowing them to finally see.
 
I vow to nurture your Spirit to the best of my ability. In times that I may let you down, it is because I have somehow let myself down. So I will thank you in advance for holding up a mirror to let me see where I have fallen off-course.
 
As you continue to courageously live in accordance with your aligned course, witnessing this will lead me back to mine. And in those times that you may falter, I will lovingly hold up the same mirror that you once held for me. This is the ebb and flow that you will come to learn in the most beautiful relationships.

This is what life is all about, after all - mastering the art of relationship - 
​                   with yourself, with others, with your community, and with this planet.

I love you, sweet angel baby, and I welcome you with open arms. Thank you for choosing to come here at this time. We have been waiting for you.

With infinite and unconditional love...

Your Mother,
​Earth"

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Whew, we did it...
              Done is better than good!

My expectation for this first blog ~ to start AND finish.
My intention ~ to welcome you here, and to let you know...
              I love you...
              I see you...
              And I love and see your little infant within!

My invitation ~
to have curiosity and listen to what your little infant
might be needing to hear from You!

Thank you for spending time with me today!
​I am truly happy our paths have crossed...

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​​If this blog post served you well, please feel free to comment and share.